SAVAGE LOVE (A Back Down Devil MC Romance Novel) Read online

  “Who? Blaine?” Miller asked.

  Gaige smiled.

  “Don’t talk about my prick,” Blaine said. “Not unless you want to see it.”

  “Nobody wants that,” Shay said.

  “Fuck that,” Blaine said. “They all do.”

  “He tell you he fucked a chick in a coffin?” Gaige asked.

  “I heard,” Miller said.

  “But you didn’t hear what else she wanted,” Blaine said.

  “And I don’t want to,” Miller said.

  “She bottled it up,” Blaine said. “You know, after I messed her. She wore it around her neck in a little jar.”

  “I said I didn’t want to know,” Miller said.

  “I mean what are we doing with the prospect?” Gaige asked.

  Blaine slid from the coffin. He hammered a fist on it. “He’s getting buried alive!”

  The prospect kicked, punched, and screamed even louder.

  Blaine laughed like a mad man.

  He then opened the lid.

  Steven popped up, his face red. Tears on his face. Snot pouring from his nose. He was shaking uncontrollably.

  “Fuck,” Blaine said. He grabbed the prospect by the neck and pulled him out of the coffin. “You think we’d bury you in this casket?”

  “I… sir…”

  “That cost money,” Blaine said. “And that’s Griffin’s coffin. Not yours.”

  “I’m… it’s…”

  Miller put a gun to Steven’s head and pulled the trigger. “You get nothing but dirt, bitch.”

  The room fell silent.

  Miller looked from the bodies to the coffin. Death was always so damn close. Maybe too damn close.

  The door opened again.

  Miller turned and saw the priest, Father Millard, standing there. He clutched the rosary around his neck and shook his head. “Oh… dear…”

  “It’s okay,” Miller said. “Threats have been taken care of.”

  “Good. Thank you.”

  Miller approached Father Millard. “Take care of this? We’ll be back with Griffin in an hour.”

  “Of course, Miller. I’ll have my guys get right to work. Fresh graves all around.”

  Miller took a wad of cash out of his pocket and gave it to the priest. “You know, I always heard you can’t take it with you.”

  “True,” Father Millard said. “But I’m still here. And I like money. Pay up and get the fuck out.”

  The priest blessed himself and tucked the money away.

  Miller wondered if anyone actually had a heart and soul.

  There was only one person that he could possibly think did.

  Ella.

  three.

  Beck’s eyes fluttered as he fought sleep. Ella bounced hard, up and down, looking like she was trying to shake something loose. It was either taking the baby for a ride in the car or doing this. And since Jerry took the keys to the car to keep Ella in one spot at all times, she had to do the silly dance.

  When his eyes shut for good, Ella stopped bouncing. She learned a tough lesson a long time ago that when the baby fell asleep it didn’t mean he was actually asleep. If Ella put the baby down right now he’d probably wake up and start fussing again. Ever since he started teething, it had become a little bit of hell in the house. If it wasn’t enough that Beck was having teething pain and needed medicine and constant attention, the whole breastfeeding thing had been taken to another level. There was nothing quite like the jolting pain of the baby suckling too hard with the razor edge of a baby tooth against his mother’s sensitive nipple.

  In the end, it was all worth it. Beck was healthy and beautiful. He was full of life, very smart, and would definitely keep Ella on her toes for the rest of her life. More so, he looked like her. Thinking that pained her a little, but she didn’t need to look into another set of Jerry’s eyes.

  Speaking of which…

  Ella turned and faced the window. The street was quiet, serene. A postcard image of the perfect middle class life and neighborhood. All the houses were designed the same, just different colors. Trees strategically planted, shrubs, a park at the end of the road. Everything created the same for people to live and not have to think about anything but a normal, perfect life.

  Of course, normal and perfect were far from reality in Ella’s house. Jerry had been under a lot of stress as of late, but it had been getting worse by the day. The long days and weeks were now longer months. He looked worn out, scared, unkempt. He screamed, drank, and took swings, something he had only done one other time and swore he’d never do again. Being married to the chief of police used to be something fun.

  Fun.

  That’s all Jerry had been.

  At one time he had been the right choice. The easier choice. The straight shooter of a cop who rose up through the ranks through his honest work. Then he took the head position and let it all go to waste. From the second he befriended Back Down Devil MC, Ella worried things would end up bad.

  And now they were.

  She had no idea why though. Just the passing stories.

  There was one thing though that stuck in her mind.

  Last week on Friday. Right past midnight, technically making it Saturday. Ella woke to the sound of voices. She walked to the steps and heard Jerry talking to someone. Then she picked up on two voices. She took the top step, then the second. Her heart had been racing, her mind telling her to stay away from it. Being able to deny was her greatest strength. And she knew how it worked in Frelen. Hell, she had flirted with the wrong side of life a long time ago.

  With Miller.

  All those hot and wild nights…

  Ella didn’t stop creeping down the stairs though. She went down far enough to see into the kitchen. Jerry was leaning against the counter, in his uniform. His gun on the counter like the way someone would toss their keys. Across from him, on the other side of the black granite countertop island, stood two large men.

  They were bikers.

  They weren’t part of Back Down Devil MC.

  “We’ll take him out,” Jerry had said. “Once that happens, all the pieces will fall into place. Trust me. I’ve watched them for years.”

  “Whatever it takes to make them die,” one of the guys had said. “I’m tired of it. Now that they killed Jake…”

  “He was useless anyway,” Jerry had said. “Good for paperwork and that’s it. You’re the muscle, guys. I’m the brains. And the badge.”

  Jerry had then turned his head and Ella had no choice but to storm up the stairs. She heard him call her name. She rushed back to bed, tucked herself in, and pretended to sleep. That was something else she had mastered. The last time they had been intimate was before Beck was born, making it well over a year. Part of Ella knew her husband had to have been getting relief somewhere else. Part of her didn’t care. She didn’t want him to touch her. Not when he was acting like a monster.

  That night, Jerry sat on the edge of the bed and stroked her hair. Touched her face. Cupped her breast. It took all of Ella’s focus not to move. She managed that night to stay away from Jerry. But that meeting never left her mind.

  As she stared out the window now, with Beck in her arms, she wondered what Jerry was up to. The easy path or the right path - whatever she had been convinced to believe - had gone so far from that, it worried her. Hell, if it wasn’t for Beck…

  The baby stirred and whined.

  Ella started to move again.

  “It’s okay,” she said. “It’s all okay.”

  There was a time Ella told herself she would be the kind of mother who would never lie to her child. But all parents told lies. They had to. It was the attempt to preserve their child’s innocence because it made them feel that innocent feeling again. But innocence was always stripped away.

  After another thirty minutes, Ella put Beck into his crib. She backed away and sat down in the rocking chair in the bedroom. She slowly rocked, telling herself she’d wait a minute to make sure the baby didn’t wake up
. Then she’d go to bed. She’d wake up and Jerry would be home. Yeah, he’d look like shit. Yeah, he’d ignore her and Beck. But at least there would be the attempt at a family.

  Ella put her head back. Her mind started to slip away. Back to a night when she had been waiting for Miller. Sitting out in the middle of nowhere, on a rock. Staring at the stars. She knew that Miller sometimes had to do things. Do things. That’s how he always put it. For the motorcycle club. Sometimes he looked hurt and had marks and bruises. Sometimes he was distant. But when they looked at each other, it was fire. Instant and crazy fire. He was her first and for a long time she thought he’d be her only.

  That night, as she sat on the rock, she heard the blip of a siren.

  Jerry got out of his car to check on her. He knew about Miller. He knew about Back Down Devil MC. It wouldn’t have been a shock to find out if Jerry and Miller were working side deals then. They hated each other as much as they respected each other.

  And that night only sealed the deal for whatever felt like forever. Because that was the night Jerry told Ella he loved her. That was the night he stole a kiss from her, something no sane person would do to a woman dating a biker. But Jerry was strong enough and brave enough do to it.

  Truthfully, it turned Ella on. That Jerry was powerful enough to be bold and that he was on the other side of the law and justice. The right side, or so she thought for a long time.

  Ella fell asleep in the chair, thinking about that night. Wondering what would have happened if Miller had shown up on time. How much her life would have been different…

  A hand covered her mouth and Ella’s eyes flew open. She gripped the arms of the chair and wanted to scream. She saw Jerry staring right at her.

  “Shh,” he whispered. “I don’t want to wake Beck.”

  Ella nodded.

  Jerry slid his hand away.

  “Downstairs,” he whispered. “Let’s talk.”

  Ella nodded again. Jerry came forward and planted a soft kiss to her lips. That kiss used to mean so much to Ella. But not so much lately.

  She left the room and shut the door without a sound. She went downstairs and met Jerry in the kitchen. His gun and badge were on the counter. He had an open beer.

  “How was your night?” Ella asked.

  “A fucking nightmare. You’re lucky you get to be here all day.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “You’re always sorry. Worried when I leave, sorry when I come back.”

  “What do you want me to say, Jerry? I stand there with the baby and wonder where you are. What you’re doing. If you’re okay. If you’re…”

  “If I’m what? Fucking other women?”

  “I never said that.”

  “You think it.”

  “Look, I know we haven’t been close…”

  “Christ, Ella. Give it the fuck up. You don’t want me to touch you. Or fuck you. I wonder if you’re fucking someone on the side.”

  “Don’t you dare say that,” Ella said. “I’m here with Beck all day. And since you took my keys…”

  “Oh, is that what it is?” Jerry yelled. “Fine. Here.”

  Jerry took out the set of the keys and threw them at Ella. She tried to catch them or swat them away. They smashed against her cheek. The keys hit the floor and Ella clutched her cheek.

  “Asshole!”

  Jerry launched around the island right at her. He put her against the counter and lifted her up. “That’s right, baby. Get nasty with me.”

  “Stop this.”

  Jerry’s hands moved to her inner thighs and up to her panties. “You fucking need it. I know you do.”

  Ella looked at her fingers and saw blood. “You cut me. You hurt me.”

  Jerry hurried and put a hand to her neck, pushing her back against the cabinets. “That’s all you can think about! Yourself. I fucking know everything, Ella.”

  “Know what?” she asked, shaking from deep within her body.

  “You heard me talking. I know it. You were fucking faking sleep. Like you always do. I’m a goddamn cop. I’m trained to know everything.”

  “I didn’t want you to get mad at me,” Ella said. “You woke me up. It wasn’t my business.”

  “You’re goddamn right it’s not,” Jerry growled.

  He pushed harder with his hand to Ella’s neck, his other hand between her legs, pressing against her panties. She quivered, hating the feeling.

  “I didn’t hear anything,” Ella said. “And if I did, who am I going to tell?”

  “I’ve had a bad fucking day. Now open your legs and let me take some worry out.”

  “Jerry, not like this. You have me scared. I can’t…”

  “What? Your pussy can’t get wet for me now?”

  “Look at you. Look at the way you’re acting.”

  “What? You don’t like it rough?”

  “No. You know that.”

  Jerry stepped away from Ella. He lifted his right fingers to his nose and smelled. Then he shook his head.

  “You can’t even get wet for your fucking husband,” he said. “You wonder why I have to do what I do.”

  “So you fuck other women?”

  “I’ll fuck anyone I want.”

  Ella swallowed the lump in her throat. “You look like shit, Jerry. You keep it up…”

  Jerry swung his hand. The pain stung Ella’s face. Jerry then stepped back to the island and put his hands to it, still facing her. She touched her cheek and stared at her husband.

  “You don’t…”

  “No,” Ella said. “No.” She slid off the counter. Her body was still shaking. She tried to step and Jerry was right there, reaching for her. Ella wiggled free. “Fuck you!”

  Jerry grabbed her shoulders. “Fuck me? Let’s go!”

  He shook Ella and she threw her hands up and out, breaking her husband’s hold. She made fists and pounded at his chest, which was stupid. Her mind told her to go for his face. Claw his eyes out. Or kick him in the balls. Yet she couldn’t help but remind herself that Jerry was the chief of police. That if he went to work with cuts and scratches on his face, there would be questions and problems.

  So Ella pounded on his chest.

  Jerry backed away, putting his hands out.

  “Goddammit, woman,” he growled.

  “Fuck you!” Ella yelled again.

  Beck then let out a cry from upstairs. Jerry snapped his head to the side and curled his lip. Then he shook his head. “Look what you fucking did.”

  “You did it,” Ella said.

  She moved and Jerry grabbed her, pulling her back to his front. An arm around her neck, keeping her tight to him.

  “No, woman,” Jerry said. “You wanted a fucking baby. I didn’t. This is all bullshit because of you. Now go take care of your kid. I’m leaving.”

  Jerry threw Ella forward. She stumbled and caught herself. She looked back, wanting to say something to really get to Jerry. But she feared the backlash. So she rushed upstairs to the bedroom.

  Beck whined with his eyes shut.

  Ella scooped him up and cradled him. She rocked left to right, then up and down, sending the baby back to sleep. When the front door slammed, Beck jumped but didn’t wake up.

  Tears filled Ella’s eyes.

  Jerry had lost his mind. She didn’t love him anymore. It had been a long time coming and now it was too far gone.

  Ella needed help. There was nowhere to turn.

  Well, there was one person to call… but he’d never answer… he’d never help…

  four.

  Miller stood outside and stared at the table. The prospects had cleaned up the mess a long time ago but Miller still saw it in his mind. Just he and Griffin sitting there, talking, shooting the breeze. Two old brothers in the MC staring out to the horizon. Across the massive lot that they had built together. Yeah, the President’s patch was on Miller’s cut, but that didn’t mean he did any of this alone. Especially with Griffin. The guy had a good mind with finances and did a grea
t job at keeping the business front not only legit but away from the MC.

  Griffin was now in the ground. Officially. Miller had watched the dirt cover the coffin and then he tossed a bottle of whiskey into the ground and walked away. He rode back to the clubhouse with the wind pounding his face and his heart bleeding all around. For all Miller knew, maybe there was a trail of blood from the cemetery to the clubhouse.

  Angry, Miller grabbed the side of the table and flipped it. It went up and over with a thud. Miller was still angry. He looked to his left, to his motorcycle. He wanted to go for a ride in the worst way. Hit the open road and shed the pain away. That wasn’t possible though. Not with the pressure and job at hand.

  When Miller turned, Gaige, Blaine, and Nate stood there.

  “What?” he growled.

  “Got a call from the chief,” Gaige said.

  “What?” Miller asked.

  “Jerry,” Nate said. “Wants to meet you. Just let me put a bullet in his head, Miller.”

  Miller lunged at Nate. He grabbed the big guy by his shirt and jammed his knuckles into Nate’s throat.

  “You listen to me,” Miller said. “That kill is mine. Everyone else can stand the fuck down.”

  “Okay, Miller,” Gaige said. He put a hand to Miller’s shoulder.

  Miller eased his grip. “Sorry, brother.”

  “I get it,” Nate said. “I shouldn’t have said that.”

  “We all want the kill,” Miller said. “This has to be done right. There’s a bigger picture at hand here. It’s not easy to fucking deal with.” Miller looked at Gaige. “What did he say?”

  “Wants to meet. Said two of us could come.”

  “Gaige, Blaine, gear up,” Miller said. “Nate, you’re staying. No hot head shit. Keep everyone here on guard. I don’t trust a fucking thing.”

  “Want us to have anyone hanging behind?” Gaige asked.

  “No,” Miller said. “I’m going to face that asshole the right way. Until it’s time to kill him.”

  “Jesus,” Blaine said. “I just wish we could right now. After what he did…”

  “I was there!” Miller yelled. “Don’t fucking paint it like you were.”

  “I saw the blood,” Blaine said. “I saw one of my brothers on the ground, dead.”

  Miller threw a quick fist and hit Blaine in the mouth.